Fear No One

12^th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Jer 20:10-13

Rm 5: 12-15

Mt 10:26-33

Cycle A

Fear no one.

For the first time in my adult life I am truly frightened. The perfect storm of pandemic and social unrest and the polarization of our society are taking a toll on me, on my psyche, and on my soul. You may be feeling the same way. I try to find peace but it seems that every news story, every conversation, everything I see, read, and hear bombards me with over-the-top fear, hatred, and anger. I cannot escape it, even in prayer, even in my closest relationships.

Terror on every side, the prophet Jeremiah says! I have never seen such fear and anger before, and it’s getting harder and harder to make sense of it and cope with it.

When you were little, did you ever get woken up by thunder, really loud thunder that seemed to shake the house? And were you frightened by it? Did is terrify you? What did you do? I think most of us ran to mom and dad’s room and jumped in bed with them.

We ran to mom and dad because we felt safe there. We didn’t actually think that they could make the thunder stop, we went there because we knew we would be held and stroked and reassured. We trusted them to make everything alright, because they always made everything alright, didn’t they? And for me as a child, mom and dad’s room was special, it was different than my room, it smelled differently, it was always sort of dark and warm. I rarely went in there during the day. Sort of like a church. And I remember running to the door, then slowly creeping in there in the dark, hearing their breathing, hesitating a bit, and then climbing in, usually on Mom’s side, to snuggle in.

We all need to feel safe, to feel loved, to feel protected by someone stronger than us when we are frightened.

But, how do we handle our terror when mom and dad aren’t there? Where do we go to feel safe? What if we have to deal with our terrors on our own, with nowhere to run to, no one to snuggle down with, no one to smooth our hair, kiss our brow, and tell us everything will be alright? What if we are alone?

So many people are in that situation right now, aren’t they? They are terrified and have to deal with their fears all by themselves, on their own. One of the worst things about this pandemic is that we are isolated from one another. We cannot run to mom and dad, in fact, we have to be isolated from them even more due to the risks to them. Many of us turn to technology like virtual meeting rooms and social media, but that’s not the same, is it? We need that physical contact, not just audio visual contact. We need to be held and fussed over and consoled. Touching a screen is not the same as touching another person.

So, we have been placed in stress like we’ve never known before, coming from every direction. How can we cope? What do you do in times of great stress? Do you turn to prayer? Do you try to pray more often, or harder, or for different things? Have you prayed for others and asked others to pray for you? And have your prayers brought you peace? Or do you turn to your intellect, and collect data and facts to support your thinking or opinions or positions to reassure you that you really are in control of the situation? Does that give you control? I think that is a large part of our fear, of my fear. The sense of losing control.

But we are never really in control, are we? God is, whether we like it or not. And that should console us. Jesus says today to fear no one, but more importantly, he says “trust me” and “acknowledge me”. We are so very valuable, so precious in God’s eyes that he will never cause us to be harmed. Even if we lose everything we have here on this earth, even if we are killed, we really haven’t lost what is most important to us. “Do not be afraid of those who can kill the body but cannot kill the soul.”

But how can you trust a God you cannot see? How can you go beyond saying and praying the words to a place of true peace in the midst of the whirlwind all around you? If it’s hard enough to trust our fellow human beings, who we can see and hear and touch, how much harder is it with our invisible God?

Well, I guess it’s a lot like running to your parents’ room during a thunderstorm. As a little child you didn’t question your mom and dad’s love for you. All the things they had done for you before - feeding and clothing you, holding you, laughing with you, cleaning up your messes – showed you that they were trustworthy. And as a little child you really didn’t have much choice in the matter; you couldn’t do all those things for yourself. So, you had to rely completely on them. Therefore, it was almost instinctive for us to run to those people when we were in dire need and afraid, because they had been so trustworthy in all those other things. You didn’t question it, you just accepted it.

As we grow up we are taught to be more and more self-sufficient, to make our own decisions, and take care of ourselves. We may turn to our parents from time to time for advice, but eventually we become fully responsible for ourselves and our actions. Sadly, many people lose sight of what it means to be a child, both of our parents and of God. We value our own independence over everyone else, and become more and more self-centered. Many people become estranged from their parents and especially from their God. They actually grow out of God and replace their love and reliance upon God with love and reliance of the self or upon the tribe.

And so I can understand why so many people today are angry and hateful and destructive…they are afraid and have no one to run to. They have been so used to relying solely on themselves that they cannot admit that they are not in control and will never fully be in control, and that it’s alright to not be in control and to need to rely on the help and comfort of someone stronger. It’s not just alright to want to run to your Father’s arms, it’s what the Father wants. Jesus told his disciples “Let the children come to me; do not prevent them, for the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” Maybe that’s what he meant and how we are supposed to think and behave.

On this Father’s Day weekend I think it’s good to reflect on what it means to be a good father, and how the role and image of a father should and can be one for all disciples. How can we all, but especially we men, be trustworthy models of our heavenly Father, to help those closest to us live peacefully during these trying times?

First, pray. If you haven’t been praying, start. If you have been praying, pray harder. Pray for peace. Pray for strength. Pray for wisdom. Pray for forbearance and patience. Pray for all those gifts of the Holy Spirit by which the world will be healed. Prayer is the solid foundation upon which all else will stand or fall.

Second, live within yourself. Realize and accept that there are a lot more things in this life you cannot control than you can. You cannot affect much of what happens to you, you can only affect your reaction to it. Try not to worry about things you cannot control. Most of all, see yourself as a little child who must rely on someone stronger. This will lead to humility and reduce or eliminate your fear.

Third, unplug. Take a break from all the negativity that bombards you. Turn off the phone and the TV and read a good book with a strong reinforcing message of love. Heck, read the bible! Have a long conversation with your spouse. Play a game. Find a way to re-ground yourself without distractions.

Next, connect. Keep coming to Mass every week. Stay in touch with people in your church community. Join in the daily coffee talks with Fr. Gray to laugh, converse, and get a jolt of inspiration along with your caffeine. Remember, where two or more are gathered in my name, there I am among you.

Finally, be kind. Fr. Gray last week spoke of kindness, which is based upon love. Kindness is such a strong way to show your love. Be kind to those closest to you. Be kind to those who disagree with you. Be kind to strangers, especially. Be kind because that is how people know they are loved. Kindness removes people’s feelings of loneliness and fear. Kindness to others allows them to be kind to others in return. Our kindness can bring a sense of the divine to those who have lost their trust in God.

The most common phrase in the bible is “Fear Not”, “Be Not Afraid”, or “Have No Fear”. May we all trust that message from the Lord so we can become the type of people the fearful run to for comfort, solace, and strength.