The Holy Family

 

Christmas Day has ended, and many of you spent it with family. Your own nuclear families and often extended family and those close friends we consider to be part of our families. I see many of them here today. The media often portray families this season as clean, happy, affluent, laughing and smiling around the tree or the table. And why not? That’s what we all long for, isn’t it? That’s what we all strive for. But families are messy, they are broken, and imperfect. They are often far from holy. Our families can be, at the same time, our greatest joy and our deepest sorrow.

 

Jesus’ family was also messy. Not his nuclear family but his extended family. On Christmas Eve we heard the beginning of Matthew’s gospel rolling out the genealogy of Jesus, and it was far from perfect. Liars and cheats, murderers and adulterers, faithful and unfaithful kings. And there was that crazy cousin John running around the desert yelling at people. But if we go through the scriptures and read about the lives of the people in that family tree, we find that the one thing that is constant is that even in the midst of their sinfulness and lack of faith in God, even at their worst, God was always faithful to them.

 

The ultimate sign of that faithfulness is that at the end of that long genealogy is Jesus. God incarnate on the earth in order to reconcile the world to himself. And God chose to begin that reconciliation within a family. It is through the family that we have the best chance for eternal life.

 

Our families exist to help us get to heaven. We are shown the way to do so in the first two readings today. Sirach lays out God’s plan for the structure of the family, with each person having their proper role. And while there is a hierarchy, there is no power struggle. Sirach uses words like honor, reverence, kindness, prayer, justice and comfort. It is in the home that these virtues are first and best nurtured and lived. And it is from the family that these virtues spread out into the world first through the extended family, then to the community.

 

Paul speaks today about how the community of faith is to live. He adds to Sirach’s list of virtues heartfelt compassion, humility, gentleness and patience, gratitude, and above all forgiveness. We are to put on love, which is the bond of perfection that holds all relationships together. We are to submit to one another out of love, because that’s what love is – diminishing ourselves for the benefit of others. The Church is called to serve, and not to be served. If we do these things, the peace of Christ will dwell in our hearts, and we will bring that peace to the world.

 

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if each of our families lived these virtues and experienced that peace? What would the world be like if every family strived to live this way? But in reality, we are often the most unforgiving, cruel and judgmental to those closest to us. Many of us have experienced unhealthy, even violent relationships in our families, and it is sometimes difficult to relate to the images of father, mother and child we hear today. That might be the ideal, but reality is so often different.

 

The Holy Family lived those virtues. Mary and Joseph actually lived with Jesus at the center of their lives. Everything was focused on him. The Kingdom of God that Jesus preached began in their household. But that didn’t mean they had it easy, that they lived in a warm little bubble, unaffected by the world. On the contrary. Mary still heard the snickers of her neighbors behind her back, gossiping about the dubious circumstances of her son’s conception. Joseph had to deal with keeping Jesus safe from a king who wanted to kill him. And Jesus, well, his neighbors even tried to throw him off a cliff when he preached the gospel to them.

 

Just because Jesus, Mary and Joseph were holy does not mean they were not affected by sin and death. Their faithfulness to God did not preclude the threat of death against them. Mary’s soul was still pierced by the sword of sorrow. And Jesus, God himself, was tortured and killed. To be holy is to be like God, and if God allowed these things to happen to himself, why would things be different for us? We are each called to take up our cross and follow him.

 

What each member of the holy family had was hope. Just like us, they were given the choice to remain faithful to the promises God had made to them. Mary had the choice to accept her role as the angel had foretold for her. Joseph had the choice to believe the dreams he had and accept his role, even though of the three he probably understood it the least. And Jesus himself had a choice to submit his will to that of his Father’s. Father, if it is possible let this cup pass me by, but not my will but yours be done.

 

And they had each other to lean on as they faced the struggles and evil of the world that sought to destroy them. They had been given a promise by angels that if they trusted in God not only would they be blessed, but the world would be changed forever.

 

In so many ways the Holy Family is just like ours. And just as they were like us, we can become like them. We too have choices to make. We can choose to love or to hate. We can choose bitterness or forgiveness. We can choose discord or reconciliation. We cut deepest those closest to us, and so the best place to begin healing is within the family.

 

Emmanuel, God with Us, they called him. God was truly and literally a part of the Holy Family, and his presence allowed them to withstand the onslaught of the forces of hell itself and yet experience his peace. God is present in your family and you too can live in His peace. When you pray to Him around your dinner table, at bedtime and throughout the day, He is the center of your life. When you live a life of charity and hospitality, you are modeling the savior. When you forgive one another you are showing the greatest love of all.

 

For Mary and Joseph, Jesus was right there, a constant reminder of the promise God had given them. Jesus is right here, in your family, and He has made the same promise to you.